Willingness, or submission in disguise?

A lot of the time in the equestrian world willingness and submission are used interchangeably but they definitely do not mean the same thing.

The differentiating factor is: if you gave your horse permission to choose would they still say yes? Willingness would your horse saying yes to your ask or your cue even when we are using our tools for submission and control. Submission would be that our horse would say no and so the only reason why they are saying yes is because we are using our tools for control, even though you may feel like you aren't in the position of power.

Whether you feel it or not, the human is always in the position of power. We are in control of where our horse lives, how they live, who they live with, when they eat, what they eat, whether they get fed or not, who they eat with etc. Because we are responsible for their basic care survival needs we are in the position of power even if you're like, well of course I'm going to do that for my horse!!! I can't stand to see a horse suffer.

Either way this relationship dynamic puts us in the position of power to our horse. Our horses can struggle underneath it or thrive with us in a powerfully connected team. It is up to you though to strategically and intentionally plan how that relationship dynamic will play out in your training. If you don't we can quickly escalate our horse in to conflict behaviours - the end result of submission mistaken as willingness.

True willingness is an alignment, a congruence even, of emotion and behaviour. Yes, I am happy to do what you ask and engaged. Your ask is compatible with my desire. True willingness doesn't mean your horse can do whatever the heck it wants - it's about builing foundations to become a powerfully conntected team together. The Holistic Horse Handling Methodology of Relaxation, Compassionate Leadership, Communication and Emotional Agility work together to build true willingness.

Which pillar are you working on now?